It isn't the reputation I want.
I can't change it.
This is a point of contention between me and my boss. He insists that I have some kind of control over my reputation. If I'd use different words or not display emotion, then others would talk well of me.
I told him that's bullshit. We sat across from each other at his desk. I held up my left hand in a pre-count gesture. "As a woman who addresses conflict, let me tell you how this goes." I started counting adjectives with my thumb, "I'm a slut, whore, bitch, control freak, cunt." With my left hand now fully open to the side of my head, I looked him straight in the eye.
"This is how it's been my entire fucking life. This is how it is. People make up rumors because that's easier than actually making time to listen to and truly consider what I have to say."
As if to scare me, he said, "Some people fear you. I've actually heard that word: fear."
"That's on them," I said.
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