Sometimes situations are so unjust and otherwise terrible that minds do not fathom them. You might provide solid evidence, exact details that go minimized or void of validation. People may try to offer evidence to the contrary of your evidence, perhaps saying that what they provide nulls your provisions.
Hey, folks. People won't hear the truth sometimes. To acknowledge the truth might require effort, and many people don't want to put in any effort because it's hard or scary or uncomfortable. It's easier to deny or avoid truth than to face it and come to terms with its reality. A life of denial or avoidance has its consequences. You can dodge the truth, but it will eek its way to presence. Thems the facts, yo.
The thing with rape, abuse, experience as a minority, racism, sexism, classism, ableism or what have you: Not everyone holds these pathways in their brains. So when injustice occurs, this person who has experienced injustice will often respond differently that those who haven't experienced injustice in those contexts. In the face of injustice, some might say,
"What's wrong with you?"
"You should really just calm down."
"You should be happy."
"Get over it."
"Don't make mistakes."
These are ignorant statements. The personalities who say them are doing their best, and still -- their awareness is limited.
It's tempting to hate on ignorance or angrily gesture at its risky behavior. The ignorance is only ignorance, though. It's like dirt in your eye or a spider bite: annoying but present. To rage at it, to tantrum at its presence might feel glorious for a short while, but the energy expenditure produces limited returns. Best to find a way to safely release that anger -- a drawing, a walk or run, screaming into a pillow, air punches when no one can see you (since sometimes violence of any form can trigger people). The dirt, that bite, the ignorance -- it's there until it is not there anymore, and it may stay. You might attempt to address it or your body may do what it can to remedy the situation. Blinks galore. Natural antiseptic. In the case of ignorance, maybe you attempt to discuss it, to find a solution for the discomfort or inconsistency. Thing is, if the environment does not support healthy interactions, your actions may drown in seas of so what or worse (mockery, venom, misery). You might express healthy concerns or expectations, but the situation and its context may refuse your observations. When you realize this kind of thing, it can feel like someone took away your breath.
We're human. We want people to understand us, to support and nurture us, to leave us be when we need time alone. But not everyone will honor this, and it can feel really bad to discover that they will not respect you or do things like you want or need. Some environments want to punish you for mistakes. Sometimes the punishments do not fit the crime, but the punishment deliverers do not see it that way or say that they have to follow rules. It can hurt a lot to be a sensitive considerate person in this world because many want to obliterate vulnerability. They're not comfortable with it, so they'd rather deny it or maybe say it's the vulnerability's fault... cast blame... point fingers so that the image in the mirror can keep up the ruse. Don't be fooled into complacent silence just because other people follow a shoddy sense of purpose. Breathe deep, Dear Reader. Exhale. Repeat. Together, we maintain and sustain justice.
Well hello there.