This culture weirdifies those who talk to themselves. "Well, as long as you don't answer!" Hahaha. Um... no. The act of speaking with ourselves is actually a super essential element of life. Yes, I do it, and yes, I answer myself. The ability to know our own thoughts about something sometimes takes that extra step of asking the self. It requires presence.
Some of my family members appear to me to be on autopilot. Several of them believe in the Christian God. When things are awry, the typical answer is that God has a plan. Instead of considering reality and bringing in facts or figures, they look to the afterlife or the Bible for answers. It seems like they're living for another time instead of living in this moment. Their critical thinking skills occasionally display as somewhat halted. Perhaps the God figure does have a plan. It still helps to look at this human life and figure out how its elements contribute to our experiences.
Someone I know is very thin and extremely religious. When she tried out an eating disorder for a little while and didn't lose weight, she attributed her non-loss to the Almighty. While the Great may have had something to do with it, it appeared that science didn't apply much to her rationale. Eating disorders don't work because the body is in chaos. Learning details about this situation (why people starve themselves, why image is so freakin' important in this culture) would likely benefit her. Instead, she attributes the ineffectiveness to the supernatural and continues to view life through that lens. I feel for her because I understand living life within those boundaries. I did so for years in my life. No disrespect to the Almighty. My message is: It's vital to bridge science and spirituality in our assessments of events.
Speaking of which, I chatted with my team lead about the topic in my previous post. We walked outside to a picnic table and discussed what happened. I gave him my perspective, and then he gave me his.
I kept my demeanor calm as I explained, "I felt uncomfortable during one of our interactions last week, and I wanted to talk about it with you. When I discussed [work topic] with you, I perceived that you looked at my chest and smiled. I felt embarrassed so I looked away."
He said he felt surprised, "If I did do it, it was completely unintentional. Sometimes my eyes wander, especially if I'm feeling uncomfortable. You'd just asked me if you could join a particular group. I didn't think you were qualified for it and I didn't know how to tell you." So that uncomfortable I felt -- he felt it, too, except for different reasons.
Conversations about uncomfortable feelings are really important. They can clear up confusion and simultaneously help people deepen bonds. It's choosing those with whom to discuss emotions... that can be tricky. I look at it this way: If I'm spending a lot of time around the person, the conversation is worth my time. In certain cases, I'll discuss topics with family members or former friends, people I don't see very often. I ask myself whether it's important, and if my own answer is yes, I go with it.
It's a big and small world at the same time. We know each other and have not a clue about fellow humans. Conversations with ourselves, conversations with others -- these are the building blocks of life.
12/9/15 -- edited third paragraph. 1/11/16 - Added link to previous post.
Well hello there.